Who Should We Trust?

If you’re in the thick of perimenopause (or well past it), you’ve likely asked yourself this million-dollar question: Who should we trust with our menopause journey? Doctors, influencers, or that friend who swears by beet juice—everyone seems to have the answer. And if you’re like me, all that conflicting guidance can sometimes set off overwhelm that causes paralysis and inaction - which is what we don’t want in these times.

A quick personal cautionary tale: At one point in my perimenopause journey, I stumbled on advice from several social media influencers and began following a regimen of vitamin D3, magnesium, and calcium supplements looking forward to curing my anxiety and insomnia. What could go wrong with a few vitamins, right? Fast forward to a Sunday, and I’m doubled over in pain on a not-so-fun trip to the ER. I had a kidney stone—likely courtesy of my new self-prescribed “wellness” routine.

That experience got me thinking: where do we turn for reliable menopause advice, and who can we actually trust? It’s not that medical professionals are clueless—many are fantastic. But let’s be real: menopause care hasn’t exactly been a highlight of medical training, so we often leave the doctor’s office with more questions than answers. Enter the internet and our personal networks to fill the gap.

But we women are resourceful—when one door (or doctor’s office) closes, we crawl through the window of Google or dive into Facebook groups. We listen to:

• Healthcare professionals: Some are menopause-savvy saints; others seem to shrug and say “get used to it.”
• Social media gurus: Those peppy Instagram/TikTok gurus with their “miracle” supplement regimens (guilty as charged).
• Friends & family: Your friend or sister who’s been there, done that, eager to share what worked (or hilariously failed).
• Our own gut: That inner voice piecing together all the above and hoping we hit the jackpot.

It’s a lot, and no wonder we’re overwhelmed. One minute you’re told to cut out caffeine and sugar; the next, an article swears by dark chocolate and coffee as menopause superfoods.

Who should we trust? Honestly, I’m still figuring that out. I’m learning to take everyone’s advice with a grain of salt and pinch of skepticism. These days I fact-check online tips with my doctor and have found comfort in talking with a community of women who get it. Sometimes the best support is knowing you’re not alone in this maze.

I want to hear from you. Where have you found guidance in navigating peri/post-menopause? Did you follow some advice that spectacularly backfired or discover a gem that actually helped? Share your stories in the comments—good or bad, funny or frustrating. Let’s swap experiences and figure out this wild ride together. After all, in a world of endless “experts,” maybe we can trust each other.